Judas is an Ethereum developer; he’s had some bad luck. He is now at Church giving a confession.
Father is the Bishop.
Judas – Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. It has been one year since my last confession.
Father – Welcome my son, please tell me how you have sinned.
Judas – Well as you know, I am an Ethereum developer. But I believe I have given false witness to another god.
Father – Who would that be, the Devil, Satan himself?
Judas – No Father, my faith strayed. I believed in Decentralisation.
Father – Huh? Not sure I follow. Please explain.
Judas – I am an Ethereum developer. You know, the world’s virtual computer. I believed that using the Ethereum protocol I could decentralise anything. And I was specifically interested in the trading of financial assets, like stocks.
Father – Ok, but what would a decentralised stock market look like?
Judas – Well, anyone, anywhere could exchange stocks. You wouldn’t need to get approval from any government or a traditional exchange like the New York Stock Exchange or Nasdaq. It would also allow anyone to sell equity in their project to anyone in the world. In short, true financial freedom for everyone, everywhere.
Father – Heresy. You planned to usurp the Angels, the NYSE, and Nasdaq. Did you not consult the good book about our Lord’s relationship with those organisations?
Judas – I did, but I thought because I used the decentralised world computer, Ethereum, that our Lord and Saviour would not mind.
Father – Son, you did not read the Gospels close enough. Specifically, the Gospel according to Howie.
Judas – Well, I thought my lawyers were well versed in the Gospels. They told me that because it was decentralised, the Gospel according to Howie did not apply.
Father – [Shakes his head in sorrow] In my last sermon, I preached that the Lord’s children must be vigilant against false prophets. Specifically those wearing Brioni suits, and white Church’s shoes. These white shoe lawyers, care not for your soul, but only for their pockets.
Judas – Oh, I missed that one. I was too hungover after a night at the Box. We were celebrating our ICO.
Father – Ah, the ICO. I also lead a vigil against that tool of the Devil. But son, how is your project decentralised, if you personally launched an ICO, and profited from it? Surely, a truly decentralised project has no identifiable leader, and no one entity profits from its operation?
Judas – I realised the errors of my ways now.
Father – How has the Lord made you repent?
Judas – The Lord decreed that I must pay a large sum of money to absolve my sins.
Father – Better that, than the Lord sending you to Sodom and Gomorrah, a.k.a. Rikers.
Judas – I know, I am forever grateful to the mercy of our Lord.
Father – I am glad you have learned son. Our Lord is merciful. But he will strike rath down upon those who threaten his kingdom.
Father – Let us pray to our Lord and Saviour. In nomine patris et filii spiritus sancti JAY CLAYTON.